Monday, September 16th, 2013 at 8:20 pm
1. these two are a lot more alike than either of them would admit now.
they’re all about gated communities, luxury shopping and insecurity. you’ve scarcely heard two men who are so awkward project this much false confidence. maybe woody allen and larry david come close but these two? they do nonchalance like gucci mane does subtlety (or phonics). which is to say, never.
and their response to shots from the rap world is usually somewhere between ‘i’ll go have sex with your sister/girlfriend/babymom right now’ and ‘i can’t be bothered’ while fanning themselves with a pocket square. with no in between. lyrical beef is unbecoming and would probably mess up their coiffes too much. (side note: remember when jay had waves and the du-rag crease in his forehead made him look like a young Anthony Davis? the 90s, kids.)
now, carefully sharing the heights of Rap Olympus, they have become reluctant neighbors, choosing verse-trading over sparring. sunday brunch at the racquet club rarely was so delightfully tony! think of what the yacht league meetings will be like when they arrive wearing the same Louis Vuitton boat shoes. ain’t no knife cutting that tension. word to Un Rivera.