The man who famed the phrase, “The Rent is Too Damn High” with his viral song is back at it. New York Gubernatorial candidate Jimmy McMillan stole the show at last night’s debate, claiming that he could not badmouth other candidates because he is “a karate expert.”
McMillan, a 64 year-old Vietnam War veteran, ran for Mayor of New York twice (in 2005 and 2009), receiving several thousand votes for his advocacy of rent reduction in New York City. This year, the man who self-declared himself “Papa Smurf” is running for New York Governor on “Rent Is 2 Damn High” ticket (he previously ran under the “Rent is Too High” party, but felt it didn’t stress the magnitude of the situation). To my knowledge he’s the only candidate to ever say on record, “I would love to put on my website that the Board of Elections can suck my d*ck, I would love to do that, but I got little children going to my website, I can’t do it, the mother*ckers. I would love to, before every one of them go to bed at night, suckin’ my damn d*ck…“ That was hypothetically speaking of course. Rocking a pair of seriously sketchy gloves, the author of A Vet For Life captivated the debate panel with his words of wisdom and served as entertainment for fellow candidates such as NY Attorney General Andrew Cuomo.
As Gawker reports, McMillan felt the following way on each issue:
- On the deficit: “It’s like a cancer. It will heal itself.”
- On negative campaigning: “As a karate expert, I will not talk about anyone up here.”
- On gay marriage: “The Rent Is 2 Damn High Party feels if you want to marry a shoe, I’ll marry you.”
- On… Jesus, I have no clue what prompted this one: “We plan to bulldoze some of those mountains in Upstate to make New York an independent state. I want my own cable company; I want my own telephone company.”
- On the rent: Too damn high.
For those wondering, McMillan told The NY Daily News that he wore those OJ Simpson style gloves because “I’m a war vet…don’t forget I was in Vietnam for two and half years and I have three Bronze Stars, but the chemicals of Agent Orange — dioxin and a lot of other chemicals mixed up — I would get sick. When I get home tonight, I know I’m not going to be able to breathe if I take them off. It could be psychological, I don’t know, but I just put em on and wear them anyway.” Yeah, I really want my governor to have a psychological compulsion to wear gloves for fear of suffocation…. McMillan went on to inform the Daily News that his success can be directly attributed to his mustache. In addition, Pennsylvania Governor Edward G Rendell issued a statement claiming that he endorses McMillan based on his stances on the abovementioned issues…true story.