Side Chick: The woman who is one level above a man’s jumpoff but
ALWAYS a step below the wifey or girlfriend.

I’m not here to put down the side chick, do you, and better you than
me so we’re cool. I’m just here to help the confused ladies who are
having a side chick/main chick identity crisis. So after I give you my
clear cut signs that you are indeed the side chick, ihiphop’s own
sexpert Mike Stylezz will come in and give you hopefuls a few tips on
what you can do to become a main chick (here’s to hoping) More often
than I would like I see my girls get caught up and infatuated with a
dude so quickly that they can’t even see the most obvious of signs he
already has a main bitch, so my first gem of advice to you is to open
your damn eyes get your head out of your ass and start to pay
attention. The following are my clear cut signs that you are in fact
the backup second string QB in his game.

1. You do not get holiday’s which includes Christmas, Halloween,
Thanksgiving, and especially Valentine’s Day (you may get the night
before or after but never on the actual holiday. Also you do not get
birthday’s (other than your own).

2. While he may meet your family (which doesn’t mean he wanted to) You
will never meet this…let me repeat NEVER meet his, so stop asking.
Although you will never meet ANY of his family, you may meet SOME of
his friends but don’t get it twisted that it only because those boys
have side chicks too and can relate…it’s like a side chick meet and
greet if you will.

3. You do get presents, he may know your dress size and/or shoe size,
but that’s because those are things he can give you- material things.
The main chick is the HBIC, she gets everything else from him
(emotions, babies, his balls) you get sex and gifts THATS IT.

4.He always comes to you, he meets you at the place, he will meet you
at your house, sound familiar? He knows he can’t take the chance of
your hoop earring falling off in his ride and his main chick finding
it, thats side chick 101.

5.As a side chick you get special phone etiquette: he will never use
your name when on the phone with you, that’s when he answers the phone
because he will definitely prefer to text you since he’s probably with
wifey, and he will always delete any all messages to and from you on a
daily basis.

If you aren’t paying attention you could easily mistake a side chick
for the main chick. The side chick has certain privileges, receives
gifts, and probably gets it in more than the main chick, but at the
end of the day you are disposable. So for you wifey wannabes here’s
some tips from an expert.

How To Step It Up From Side Chick To Main Chick (Mike Stylezz):

1. You need to prove to him you`re more than a side chick,  that  you`ll be there no matter what happens. Ride or die chick. Say things that`ll make him question how loyal she is. Say things like I would rock with you even if you were broke and bummy.

2. First make sure you look better than his girl, if you dont then lets be honest you`re just a good time, and he`ll never leave her for you. If you are somewhat better looking then  go to the gym wear your sexy heels all the time. Make sure your hair and nails  are always on point.

3. Listen to him very carefully. When he talks about her try to be the opposite of everything she is. If she complains be super understanding. If she never has time for him pretend your taking off from work just to see him.

4. Sex game has to always be on point! Super on point. You`re obviously a good lay if hes coming back for more and risking his relationship but be consistent.  The day you start slipping is the day hes out. Just got tired of the cooch. You`re done.

5. Dont Pressure him to leave his girl. If you butter him up enough and treat him like a king he`s gunna start doubting how much he likes or loves her. Then one day their gunna fight and hes going to think about how much better life is with you  (if you done everything right so far) and its a wrap.

6. Do not ask him to buy you anything! Dont get in the “I`m you`re side chick you better bribe me or i`ll tell” mindset. Guys are severely turned off by that, for that they can just cheat with a nasty hooker and she wouldn’t tell and most likely cost way less.

7. Make sure he knows hes the only one getting to smash that a$$, he`ll never take you serious if he knows you`re also giving the business to other dudes. Remember you`re trying to make him think you`re better than wifey not a slide.

-In conclusion as a dude the only reason I would get a side chick is  because I`m bored, you have alot of skank swag compared to my main girl, you`ll do things sexually she wont, I just want to prove that I still got it or you`re just so hot I dont want to let the chance go by. Its hard for a guy to change his mind once hes wifed up, he has so much invested but if he is slightly attracted to you and  you follow my rules and be patient there is chance that he`ll hip toss that broad and rock with you.